Drug addiction/sobriety

[David.]

Forget the date of my last usage, going to mark it as 4/14/17

 

[Sebastian]

Ptsd is as close to hell on earth as you could get. They were hit with something they literally could not handle and their brain tries to reconcile by reliving it again and again and again, sometimes forever.

I believe addiction is a far more nuanced thing and is a major issue in our society.

Mental health in general has been circling the drain since Reagan gutted funding in the 80s. Much, much more needs to be done to address it. And for our recent veterans in particular. But, if the GOP gets its way with their awful Trumpcare, it will get far worse.

I've lost five friends and family to suicide in the past 18 months. This is unacceptable.

 

[David.]

I believe addiction is a far more nuanced thing and is a major issue in our society.

Mental health in general has been circling the drain since Reagan gutted funding in the 80s. Much, much more needs to be done to address it. And for our recent veterans in particular. But, if the GOP gets its way with their awful Trumpcare, it will get far worse.

I've lost five friends and family to suicide in the past 18 months. This is unacceptable.

That is nuts. We're they all military??

 

[David.]

Coming up on two months. As direct consequence of feeling better from diet and exercise and implementation of personal cbt program to resocialize, recently became more open to dating.

.. Completely ignoring the legitimate ones to readress the problematic ones from the past. Guess which ones are interesting.

On lots of tren. Libido skyrocketing. At the same level it was while on Adderall. Unhealthy behaviors manifesting.

 

[Sebastian]

That is nuts. We're they all military??

No. None were military in my case.

Not a single one was a person who exhibited distress. All had great lives. Each was a shock. I've become all too accustomed to it.

It belies how deep the problem is. And the GOP bill will only make it far worse.

 

[David.]

I'll hit 2 months in a couple hours.

It started off rough. I was suicidal for a period. Your brain fucking with you and dealing with a lot of new information at the same time can be a pretty bad mix.

I'm on a good sleep schedule, I'm infinitely less argumentative, my diet is fixed, I've lost weight, I have much more energy, my weeks are just as profitable as when I was on. I have no desire to use. I am working on relationships again and I'm meeting people. Not ready to date seriously, and it's suggested to take a year off after sobering up as relationships going awry are the biggest cause of relapse. I'm nice to people. I can actually feel connection, and it's fission. Just.. Random people throughout the day. Just being nice. You're a machine on that shit. You don't exist anymore, you're just a mechanism absorbing and accomplishing and fucking, round clock.

No more panic attacks. No rages of shame.

Quitting gsugar made quitting Adderall easier. I know if I have any sugar, it's not satisfying and it'll just make me want more until it's off the tracks. Those words existed in regards to drugs, but they had no weight until it made sense with sugar.

Things are better.

 

[Adam]

I'll hit 2 months in a couple hours.

It started off rough. I was suicidal for a period. Your brain fucking with you and dealing with a lot of new information at the same time can be a pretty bad mix.

I'm on a good sleep schedule, I'm infinitely less argumentative, my diet is fixed, I've lost weight, I have much more energy, my weeks are just as profitable as when I was on. I have no desire to use. I am working on relationships again and I'm meeting people. Not ready to date seriously, and it's suggested to take a year off after sobering up as relationships going awry are the biggest cause of relapse. I'm nice to people. I can actually feel connection, and it's fission. Just.. Random people throughout the day. Just being nice. You're a machine on that shit. You don't exist anymore, you're just a mechanism absorbing and accomplishing and fucking, round clock.

No more panic attacks. No rages of shame.

Quitting gsugar made quitting Adderall easier. I know if I have any sugar, it's not satisfying and it'll just make me want more until it's off the tracks. Those words existed in regards to drugs, but they had no weight until it made sense with sugar.

Things are better.

Great job Dave! Sounds like you have a really focused approach and a high awareness of your triggers and coping strategies

 

[David.]

Great job Dave! Sounds like you have a really focused approach and a high awareness of your triggers and coping strategies

I really dug into the effects of drugs and neurochemistry and happiness. There re a few helpful resources on YouTube. Outside of that, I got lucky in the fact that Iost my school subsidized health coverage.

 

[The Process God]

Nice job, Dave! Here's a little secret I've used with training clients to help with sugar cravings. Do 2 protein shakes a day. Each is going to be 2 scoops of protein in milk. 24g per scoop x 2 scoops + 16-20 oz of milk = 64-68g protein per shake. Do the first one right when you wake up. This is the more important one. Then the other one can be drank either throughout the day or all at once sometime in the afternoon. Plus the gainz (and even fat loss) are great.

 

[David.]

Nice job, Dave! Here's a little secret I've used with training clients to help with sugar cravings. Do 2 protein shakes a day. Each is going to be 2 scoops of protein in milk. 24g per scoop x 2 scoops + 16-20 oz of milk = 64-68g protein per shake. Do the first one right when you wake up. This is the more important one. Then the other one can be drank either throughout the day or all at once sometime in the afternoon. Plus the gainz (and even fat loss) are great.

I don't have any. Knowing it's consequences is a sufficient deterrent. Acknowledging thoughts of food manufactures insulin logically helps you disengage from cravings

 

[The Process God]

I don't have any. Knowing it's consequences is a sufficient deterrent. Acknowledging thoughts of food manufactures insulin logically helps you disengage from cravings

Biologically-speaking, you're not going to have much, if any, affect on your craving levels based on the power of thought. However, actively avoiding sugar will help stabilize blood sugar and hormone levels over a period of days/weeks, which will, in turn, get rid of sugar cravings.

And get some god damn protein, motherfucker.

 

[David.]

Biologically-speaking, you're not going to have much, if any, affect on your craving levels based on the power of thought. However, actively avoiding sugar will help stabilize blood sugar and hormone levels over a period of days/weeks, which will, in turn, get rid of sugar cravings.

And get some god damn protein, motherfucker.

why are you recommending protein? This has literally never been an issue.

I recommend looking into Mindfulness. You absolutely do disengage from "you", which is an amalgam of thoughts and emotions that run through your head, and turn it off and bring back to center. What I've recommended is absolutely true. You're only mad because you've had thoughts that lead to more thoughts and you're reaching to them. If you acknowledge them, focus on being present and letting those thoughts go, you're not mad. You aren't hungry if you see cake. You just see cake. Your insulin is being released. If you understand that it's a physiological response, you're seeing the matrix for the code and its no longer real.






3 month mark.

 

[David.]

Have been in possession since Friday. Sweating bullets since. Just got rid of them

 

[David.]

Spoke with attorney today - newer count has successfully been dismissed, paperwork has been filed to expunge the first. In 3 months I'll have a clean record and can look for a real job.


In the meantime, money is good. Can pay off my student loans already.

 

[WarAdmiral]

Four years clean here and no desire at all to relapse. I haven't been to a meeting in over three years. I'm still a mess, but am much more responsible in my relationship with myself and others that I care for and care for me. Integrity with being responsible intertwined with the ever expanding growth of self-knowledge has been the rock bottom of my recovery. It took me over 40 years to learn how to cope with pain, fear and self-loathing. I was an addict to suffering more so than any substance. Still am, but my awareness of this and understanding has helped me make better responsible decisions over the course of my daily activities over the past few years.
It took me 40 plus years to know my true feeling of being content. I had way underrated how rich I could feel by just being content with every God damn thing. Content isn't a place to stay, but a place to visit and recharge for what gives me purpose and meaning in this life and that is by mostly being true to myself and others as reasonably possible. Reasonably is a key word here. I have to give myself room to screw up so that I have something to learn from and I have also found that being a saint is extremely boring and can be just a bad of an addiction as opiates.
I reckon one of the main keys for me also is how balanced I am between selfishness and selflessness. It's not something that I measure continually because I could easily turn it into a guilt trap for self-loathing. I have worked on seeing when it is good to give and take. Charity can be the murder of self-reliance and dignity, and not being receptive to charity can murder kindness. There seems a golden mean to aim for, but I can't claim to walk it, but I do try.

I read the first ten pages of this thread and skipped to the end. I'm happy for you in that you seem to have had enough of the reliance on unnecessary substances. It's a part of your story and I hope that through your daily decisions leave it to the early chapters of the book of your life that you're living. Do your damnedest to make it a good read with a happy ending.