The Perv Pool

[David.]

People need to stop framing it like this. This was not next morning regret. She didn't enjoy any of it during it. You can argue a lot about this but I feel like I see it put this way to support a point that doesn't exist in this story.

She went over and sucked his fucking dick dude Jesus christ. She did that. This is just loony and cringe as fuck. She. Sucked. His. Dick. On. Her. Own. Volition.

"don't infantilize wahmen"

 

[David.]

That’s not really true though. I just feel like some people are painting her as an opportunist who should’ve done this or that without fairly evaluating his actions. Again, I’m not saying he committed a crime, but that doesn’t mean his behavior was totally okay. Nuance exists.

She needs to get the fuck over it then. She's a goddamn adult. She's made other adult decisions recently hasn't she? Like deciding to try to ruin aziz Ansari because she sucked his dick on her own volition. The whole thing is absolutely ridiculous to defend. It's kicking a hole in the metoo movement and the defense isn't going to exactly help it either.

I said exactly this would happen. We all did. The line is drawn. That women and this instance is on the wrong side of that line.

 

[MediumBaller]

That’s not really true though. I just feel like some people are painting her as an opportunist who should’ve done this or that without fairly evaluating his actions. Again, I’m not saying he committed a crime, but that doesn’t mean his behavior was totally okay. Nuance exists.

But she's alleging that he sexual assaulted her. Sure, it sounds like he was pushy, but she still went along with it. It seems silly of her to blame Aziz for things that she willingly did. It also gives ammunition to the idea that the whole #MeToo movement is an anti-male witch hunt.

 

[David.]

But she's alleging that he sexual assaulted her. Sure, it sounds like he was pushy, but she still went along with it. It seems silly of her to blame Aziz for things that she willingly did. It also gives ammunition to the idea that the whole #MeToo movement is an anti-male witch hunt.

SNL went crazy on it Saturday. "men need to be more decent". As if I have fuck all to do with Harvey Weinstein

 

[MediumBaller]

SNL went crazy on it Saturday. "men need to be more decent". As if I have fuck all to do with Harvey Weinstein

If you go to a guy's apartment and get naked he's going to try to have sex with you, especially if you then proceed to blow him. Any rational person realizes this. If you make it clear you don't want to and he doesn't stop then that's sexual assault. If he stops when you ask him to then it's not sexual assault. This girl seems like she just wants to ruin the man's life.

 

[-Akronite-]

Most girls protest a bit when you're working your way into a hook-up. There's a difference between a soft "no" when you're trying to move forward a level and her actually asking you to stop. The former means "back it up a bit and try again in five minutes." The latter actually means stop.

As I said, nuance exists.

And the Aziz story did not paint the picture of a smooth operator that knew how to read signals, that's part of the problem. He waited until she wasn't literally protesting and jumped to top speed every time. If nothing else, it comes off embarrassing for him if that's how he handles a hookup.

 

[-Akronite-]

But she's alleging that he sexual assaulted her. Sure, it sounds like he was pushy, but she still went along with it.

That's why I find it complex and find the conversation that it has stirred interesting. Again, I'm not sure I agree with the assault assertion, at least in a legal context. But so many women can tell stories just like this where they have a clueless (or worse) and aggressive partner.

It seems silly of her to blame Aziz for things that she willingly did. It also gives ammunition to the idea that the whole #MeToo movement is an anti-male witch hunt.

People will find that ammunition regardless.

I kinda feel like most of the people that say this are the types, like you, that are actually afraid it's a witch hunt. Aziz hasn't gone down for this, the mob actually looked at the story and didn't destroy him, which is actually a good sign for the movement.

EDIT: A lot of women are undecided and/or defending him. It's not as if it's just the dudebros on here, so I don't think this really endangers #MeToo because that movement is bigger than a single story.

 

[billmac91]

Celebrities should record their private interactions with women, imo. Even when they do nothing wrong like Aziz they risk having their name dragged through the mud if someone decides they regret what happened after the fact.

Some do.....blast from the past, but I know Jermaine Dupri used to let women know everything was being recorded on a security camera in his room. And that was like 15 years ago....

The risk of a woman not being comfortable with being taped, and therefore not wanting to have sex, was worth it to him if he couldn't falsely be accused of sexual assault.

 

[Rich]

People need to stop framing it like this. This was not next morning regret. She didn't enjoy any of it during it. You can argue a lot about this but I feel like I see it put this way to support a point that doesn't exist in this story.

I mean dude....she got naked on his countertop and spread her legs wide and sucked his dick afterwards.

I just....huh?

THis is like saying when I shot you with the gun I wasn't trying to kill you. Maybe that's true, but the act itself speaks so loudly that no one outside of your own head is going to believe you. So when she sucked his dick of her own free will....that signifies she was enjoying it. At least for a moment..

Like, she wasn't drunk and she wasn't forced. So if she's not enjoying sucking my dick, then, you know, stop sucking my dick.

She is a full-grown, adult female, correct? So she's capable of voicing her opinion on whether or not she wants to suck my cock? For instance, if she doesn't want to suck my cock, she can say "no?" Correct?

So if I ask a girl to suck my cock, and she starts sucking my cock, well, I think it's pretty fucking logical to then conclude she wanted to suck my cock.

I mean I'm all for the MeToo movement, but it can't be at the expense of women being fully capable humans with agency and power. Either they're equal and can open their mouths and voice their opinion or they aren't.

So, yea, she willingly sucked his dick and then regretted it afterwards. That's...exactly what happened. It fucking happens. We get with people we wish we hadn't. Oh fucking well. Welcome to life.

Now, moving on to the next part, again, sorry, but if you suck my dick and I eat you out, I think it's pretty fucking reasonable to assume vaginal intercourse is coming up on the docket. Strange, I know. This isn't like me buying you dinner and you owing me sex. THis is just the very logical, very obvious next step of the night at this point.

So is he creep for expecting it? Fuck no. Moreover, her supposed "clear, non-verbal signals" weren't clear at all. After she had her mini-breakdown or whatever she gets out of the bathroom, sits down in front of the couch, between his legs, with her back to him. THE FUCK? That's a goddamn signal that you still want to be near me and want my hands on you. That sure as fuck isn't a "clear, non-verbal signal" that you are uncomfortable. In fact, it's exactly the opposite. If you're uncomfortable, fucking say it, or at the very least, don't sit like that. What the hell?

And if he's not taking her "clear, non-verbal" hints that she doesn't want to proceed with sex...then, again, she's a fully capable adult female with her own power and can...walk out the door. A crazy concept, I know.

The best part is her realization that Aziz Ansari was just in it for sex. No shit, woman. You came into his apartment after dinner on date 1. You sucked his dick on date 1. He ate you out on date 1. He probably assumed, and quite reasonably so, that you ALSO were just in it for sex. That would be the logical assumption there....

 

[-Akronite-]

I mean dude....she got naked on his countertop and spread her legs wide and sucked his dick afterwards.

I just....huh?

THis is like saying when I shot you with the gun I wasn't trying to kill you. Maybe that's true, but the act itself speaks so loudly that no one outside of your own head is going to believe you. So when she sucked his dick of her own free will....that signifies she was enjoying it. At least for a moment..

Like, she wasn't drunk and she wasn't forced. So if she's not enjoying sucking my dick, then, you know, stop sucking my dick.

She is a full-grown, adult female, correct? So she's capable of voicing her opinion on whether or not she wants to suck my cock? For instance, if she doesn't want to suck my cock, she can say "no?" Correct?

So if I ask a girl to suck my cock, and she starts sucking my cock, well, I think it's pretty fucking logical to then conclude she wanted to suck my cock.

I mean I'm all for the MeToo movement, but it can't be at the expense of women being fully capable humans with agency and power. Either they're equal and can open their mouths and voice their opinion or they aren't.

So, yea, she willingly sucked his dick and then regretted it afterwards. That's...exactly what happened. It fucking happens. We get with people we wish we hadn't. Oh fucking well. Welcome to life.

Now, moving on to the next part, again, sorry, but if you suck my dick and I eat you out, I think it's pretty fucking reasonable to assume vaginal intercourse is coming up on the docket. Strange, I know. This isn't like me buying you dinner and you owing me sex. THis is just the very logical, very obvious next step of the night at this point.

So is he creep for expecting it? Fuck no. Moreover, her supposed "clear, non-verbal signals" weren't clear at all. After she had her mini-breakdown or whatever she gets out of the bathroom, sits down in front of the couch, between his legs, with her back to him. THE FUCK? That's a goddamn signal that you still want to be near me and want my hands on you. That sure as fuck isn't a "clear, non-verbal signal" that you are uncomfortable. In fact, it's exactly the opposite. If you're uncomfortable, fucking say it, or at the very least, don't sit like that. What the hell?

And if he's not taking her "clear, non-verbal" hints that she doesn't want to proceed with sex...then, again, she's a fully capable adult female with her own power and can...walk out the door. A crazy concept, I know.

The best part is her realization that Aziz Ansari was just in it for sex. No shit, woman. You came into his apartment after dinner on date 1. You sucked his dick on date 1. He ate you out on date 1. He probably assumed, and quite reasonably so, that you ALSO were just in it for sex. That would be the logical assumption there....

You wrote a whole lot but I didn't argue against any of these things. I'm just saying it wasn't like she decided the next day that she didn't like it. And mainly, I just hate that buzz phrase of "regret does not equal rape." Because, while a technically true statement, I feel like it's used to excuse shit that doesn't fit.

 

[OptimusPrime]

And mainly, I just hate that buzz phrase of "regret does not equal rape." Because, while a technically true statement, I feel like it's used to excuse shit that doesn't fit.

It sounds like it fits here.

 

[-Akronite-]

It sounds like it fits here.

Well literally no since it wasn't a rape or a rape accusation. But this does come off more to me like bad aggressive sexual experience versus criminal sexual assault.

 

[Kbiz]

The problem with the whole #MeToo movement is the stigma that surrounds "making the first move." As men, we've always been told it us up to us to make the first move. It shows confidence, assertiveness, blah-blah - things girls apparently find attractive.

In Aziz's case, it's easy to see how the situation escalated, regardless of if his date wanted it to or not. Believe me when i say, If a girl just flat out would tell guys at the start of a date, "I don't kiss, give bj's, give sex, whatever on a first date", it would make our lives much easier but often times when a date is going well, our minds wander all over the place finding the perfect opening to initiate anything.

I guess Aziz is at fault because he didn't pick up on her non-verbal cues that she wasn't interested but more often than not, and even more so when i am interested in a girl physically, I'm not "in the moment." I'm certainly not in tune with every "non-verbal cue", whatever the fuck that means, the girl is either throwing at me to make a move or not. We are thinking ahead - do we go to another bar after this? Should it be one strategically located within a few blocks of my house? If she agrees to going to that bar, How do i get her to my house?"

Unless I am getting straight-up eye fucked or if a girl is initiating some sort of touch, your "non-verbal cue" is completely lost on me because usually my mind is hard at work trying to continually exhibit my best qualities while simultaneously trying to figure out what we should do next.

This specific excerpt from the article pissed me off:

Ansari wanted to have sex. She said she remembers him asking again and again, “Where do you want me to fuck you?” while she was still seated on the countertop. She says she found the question tough to answer because she says she didn’t want to fuck him at all.

Then fucking say, "I don't want to fuck you at all." It makes it pretty easy to walk away from the "encounter" without worrying about being accused of anything. I'd rather take a bruised ego than being accused of "aggressive sexual engagement" when men have been instructed to make the first move to show interest since we've been stealing kisses on the playground.

 

[Jack Brickman]

You wrote a whole lot but I didn't argue against any of these things. I'm just saying it wasn't like she decided the next day that she didn't like it. And mainly, I just hate that buzz phrase of "regret does not equal rape." Because, while a technically true statement, I feel like it's used to excuse shit that doesn't fit.

It sounds to me that that's exactly what happened. She can say all she wants that she didn't want to do any of it at the time, but she still did it. That implies to me that she wanted to. If she didn't want to, she wouldn't have sucked his dick in the first place. He didn't have a gun to her head. She let him eat her out. Again, no gun to her head. It sounds like, at some point, she decided she didn't want to have sex, then realized the next day she regretted the whole thing and so her mind started framing it like she never wanted it at all to make her feel better. Or perhaps so she could tell herself that she wasn't acting slutty (and I'm not trying to slut shame her here...I'm all for girls being sexually free) and that he forced himself on her.

 

[David.]

You know Im seeing a lot of weird shit here.

Who the hell asks? Where do you want me to fuck you? That is weird. You make out and of it progresses it progresses. The girl normally does a mutual amount of work.

Some of this is kind of weird but it looks more like people are socially retarded than malicious. I do, 100% feel like people need to be less socially retarded.