Understanding why.......

[Coyote850]

My sister, who is 66 years old, has terminal cancer. She has been a wonderful sister, mother and wife. Yet she is wasting away from this horrible fucking disease. With all the horrible people on this Earth, why her???? I just don't fucking understand...…….

Sorry, trying to get drunk enough to fall asleep. Hold your family close, they won't be around forever.

 

[cavman]

My sister, who is 66 years old, has terminal cancer. She has been a wonderful sister, mother and wife. Yet she is wasting away from this horrible fucking disease. With all the horrible people on this Earth, why her???? I just don't fucking understand...…….

Sorry, trying to get drunk enough to fall asleep. Hold your family close, they won't be around forever.

So sorry your family is going through this. Life is just a roll of the dice unfortunately and we all do not know how it will end. Make sure you spend as much time as you can with her.

 

[Randolphkeys]

Sorry dude, I'd like to think that the internet still has a soul. I do believe RCF still has a soul. You will get my support and I'm sure the support of others during this time. Loss of a sibling is so much harder than other losses. You expect them to still be with you for longer, I hear you. My sibs are in good health but friends have lost a sibling and it shook them hard. You aren't alone.

 

[Coyote850]

Sorry dude, I'd like to think that the internet still has a soul. I do believe RCF still has a soul. You will get my support and I'm sure the support of others during this time. Loss of a sibling is so much harder than other losses. You expect them to still be with you for longer, I hear you. My sibs are in good health but friends have lost a sibling and it shook them hard. You aren't alone.

You just never know how long they will be with you. Of all the forums I am on, RFC can be the roughest, yet most real. Just like life. That why I love this place. Yes it has a soul.

 

[Cratylus]

My sister, who is 66 years old, has terminal cancer. She has been a wonderful sister, mother and wife. Yet she is wasting away from this horrible fucking disease. With all the horrible people on this Earth, why her???? I just don't fucking understand...…….

Sorry, trying to get drunk enough to fall asleep. Hold your family close, they won't be around forever.

I just lost my dad to pancreatic cancer about three weeks ago so I know what you are going through. Not quite the same as what you are dealing with, but my dad was also my best friend so it has been rough. RCF has been a welcome place of respite for me during these past few weeks (even more so than usual) when I've needed to unplug from my life for a while and be around other Cleveland sports fans. It's hard to believe I've been a member here almost 10 years. RCF in a way has sort of become a "band of internet brothers" for me. You've been here even longer than me so I know you know what I mean by that.

Hang in there, man.

 

[Adam]

@Cratylus @Coyote850 commiserations dudes. Grief is the most difficult thing we all have to go through and understanding a loved ones terminal illness begins the process whilst they are still with us making it even more challenging. RCF is brother/sisterhood and we all are here to provide a space to vent if you need it.

 

[FiveThous]

Fuck Cancer, sorry you and your family have to go through this.

 

[Coyote850]

I just lost my dad to pancreatic cancer about three weeks ago so I know what you are going through. Not quite the same as what you are dealing with, but my dad was also my best friend so it has been rough. RCF has been a welcome place of respite for me during these past few weeks (even more so than usual) when I've needed to unplug from my life for a while and be around other Cleveland sports fans. It's hard to believe I've been a member here almost 10 years. RCF in a way has sort of become a "band of internet brothers" for me. You've been here even longer than me so I know you know what I mean by that.

Hang in there, man.

I'm sorry for your loss man. Losing your parents is extremely tough on a person. I lost my dad in '03 and mom in '05. RFC is exactly as you describe it. We can banter and argue, but we still are CLE fans. Kinda like an internet home away from home.

 

[MGMT]

I’m sorry boss. I’m sure she’s lived a productive and loving life for herself and those by whom she’s been surrounded. While this is deeply saddening, at least you aren’t illustrating regrets within your relationship with her; and that, would be far more devastating than anything.

Sit with her and recall the memories you’ve shared. Irrespective of her physical departure from the world your memories and recount of her will never be taken by anyone or anything.

 

[Coyote850]

My sister passed away around 11pm tonight. She got to say good bye to her family and friends, and is at peace.

 

[Loki478]

I am sure most of us are here to lend an ear if you ever need to talk. I am sorry for your loss.

 

[Hurl Bruce]

Very sorry for your loss.

Expressing yourself and how you're feeling on here can be therapeutic. Let it out if you need to. There are too many people who can identify with your situation. Fuck cancer.

 

[Hurl Bruce]

The equipment manager from when I played football at CWRU just passed away last night from pancreatic cancer. He did this for pretty much all sports for both genders. The outpouring of love and memories from time spent with him is pretty amazing and a testament to the person he was and the life he lived.

I'm sure your sister had a similar impact on people in her life. That's the sort of thing that's important now that what we can't control has taken its course. We can control how we feel about that person and how we remember them.

Of course, I'm fucked. They're going to think, "That's the guy who was always trying to be funny at inappropriate times."

 

[Cavatt]

Cancer is especially tough because it seems so random and you want to blame it on something. For some reason people are comforted by people getting cancer from drinking or smoking. In reality most cancers are not because of the environment or something you did or didn't do. It certainly feels like a punishment.

Loretta Lynn had a line in a song that was "why's that old drunk alive when a daddy like mine has died?"

I think everyone feels that way whether something bad has happened to you or a loved on. Best thing we can do is support people who are suffering. Be understanding. Take extra time to take care of yourself and your family. There is no inherent meaning here, but there is meaning in how you respond and react to loss.

 

[Coyote850]

This place is my sports home away from home. So yes it helps me to vent.

The experience we had with home hospice (Summa) was horrible. Nurses canceling, lack of supplies, just absolute incompetence. Myself, brother, sister and nephew were left damn near on our own for 11 days to care for my terminally ill sister. We winged it. We did the best we could under the most ungodly pressure a family could feel. Finally after 11 days my nephew had had enough and demanded my sister be put in Akron City Palliative care. They were amazing and cared for my sister till she passed.
If you are EVER in this situation, EDUCATE yourself as to the options you have with home hospice, don't believe a damn word they tell you. They WILL lie to you to keep you under their system, just so they don't lose the business.
This experience has me hating our health care system, not so much the care givers, but the system. It is horrifying.