The Implosion of the Los Angeles Lakers

[KI4MVP]

Great to see Kobe cares so much about our pick

[Lottery God]

Jerry Buss Surprisingly Leaves Entire Estate To Former Laker Luke Walton
Sports News in Brief • sports • ISSUE 49•08 • Feb 23, 2013

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LOS ANGELES—In an unexpected turn of events, sources confirmed Saturday that billionaire Jerry Buss, the widely beloved owner of the Los Angeles Lakers who passed away at the age of 80 last week, has left his entire fortune to the team’s former small forward Luke Walton. “My dear Luke: I leave you everything I have, as you are the sole benefactor of my estate,” read a portion of Buss’ will obtained by reporters, which specified that Walton would inherit over $1.6 billion in money and assets, including ownership of the Lakers, from the late real estate mogul. “You were like a son to me, so I want to ensure that you’re always taken care of and never have to worry about money again. Trading you was one of the hardest things I’ve ever had to do in my life, but I just hope you know how much I always cared about you.” At press time, an emotional Walton was reportedly able to finally quit his low-paying and demeaning job as a bench player on the Cleveland Cavaliers.

UPDATE: Walton has fired the entire Lakers front office, replaced head coach Mike D’Antoni with Phil Jackson, and cut Dwight Howard.

http://www.theonion.com/articles/jer...1422/?ref=auto

Kobe Bryant Holds Kobe-Bryant-Only Meeting To Discuss Lakers
Sports News in Brief • sports • NBA Basketball • ISSUE 49•07 • Feb 14, 2013

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LOS ANGELES—After a tumultuous and disappointing first half of their season, Kobe Bryant reportedly called a Kobe-Bryant-only meeting Thursday to air out the many issues still plaguing the Lakers. “There are 29 games to go and we’re still under .500, so everybody needs to step their game up right now,” Bryant reportedly said during the closed-door talks, which did not include coaches, upper management, or any of the other 13 players on the Lakers’ roster. “I’m sick of hearing excuses about shoulder injuries or trade speculation. We should be contending for the title, but I feel like I’m the only one out there who even gives a damn. And frankly, that’s pathetic.” Reached for comment, Bryant told reporters the meeting was “very positive,” as it was unanimously agreed that the 15-time All-Star should get more of the ball during games.

http://www.theonion.com/articles/kob...1301/?ref=auto

[blommen]

gotta love the onion.

[RchfldCavRaised]

Dwight Howard should have been traded.

[Green Lantern]

Dwight Howard should have been traded.

Yep,they could have gotten Lopez and that would have been good enough...now dude's gonna walk this summer.

[ArchieBunker7]

Dwight Howard should have been traded.

A lot of shoulda, coulda's, but didn't on that team this year. I agree completely, though. Never been a big fan of his. Absolutely cut to my core when he made all those FT's against us in the ECF. Only CLE.

But, honestly, even if they wanted to, where the any takers? I mean, yes, I'm sure someone out there gives you a loaf of bread for the guy, but do they put up with his bs for half a season, hope it works out for a playoff run, and then pray he signs a contract? I just don't see it. I'd be willing to bet the trade market on DH would be extremely limited.

[jonmchugh]

who woulda thought that with a line up of nash - kobe - world peace - gasol and howard that the lakers would be battling for 8th place? crazy!

[Mazer Rackham]

who woulda thought that with a line up of nash - kobe - world peace - gasol and howard that the lakers would be battling for 8th place? crazy!

Don't forget this guy:

[Dr. Gymbo]

^ The tank commander strikes again.

[Mdog1]

^ The tank commander strikes again.

Jamison may not technically be on our team this year, but he's doing his best to make our future brighter.

[Damage]

Jamison may not technically be on our team this year, but he's doing his best to make our future brighter.

By pure osmosis he's fucking us...again.

[Cavatt]

By pure osmosis he's fucking us...again.

Jamison taught me a lot about looking good while being terrible at your job.

[GCCSteel]

With as bad as Howard is playing compared to his ability, he is still leading the league in rebounding. I would have liked to see a Brook for Dwight swap, as well. Haven't seen him play in person, but Brook's PER is at 24 I believe. One of the rare players who is playing UP to his contract.

[CavsFaninNJ]

If you were the Lakers, I don't know why you go inside the guy who's never really been on a winning team before, aside from a few horrible months in cleveland... (Jamison)

[melecoaze]

Another W for them. Mamba playing out of his mind lately.